Let’s get a little real today, shall we?

My “work” for the past few years has been to get extremely crystal clear about who I am:

my beliefs
my needs
my values
my opinions
my dreams
my quirks
my triggers
my passions
my needs (yes, I realize I wrote it already, but it’s a big one for me).

The second step to this work is to actually do something different once the awareness is present, but that’s a different conversation for another day. Step one on the path of creating a life that feels authentic, abundant, and joyful will always be: self-awareness.

Inner work is the hardest work we will ever do. It is hard to reflect on the past without falling into guilt, shame, or regret for showing up in ways we aren’t necessarily proud of.

It is hard to examine our childhood and admit that it wasn’t as healthy or supportive as it should have been. It’s hard to see ourselves as we are today without the mask of excuses or justifications or rationalizations but with unveiled clarity on where we need to grow.

It’s hard to take responsibility for the hurt and destruction we’ve contributed to in relationships.

It’s hard to get really, really honest about what isn’t working in our lives; it’s even harder to confront the changes we know we need to make but will blow up plans or relationships.

It’s easier to live in blissful ignorance (which is an oxymoron and an impossible state of being), where we can’t see the harm and we can’t feel the inner turmoil and we can’t sense the misalignment and we can’t hear the ways we hurt others.

But it’s also hard to stay stuck, lost, confused, depressed, hurting, apathetic, and uninspired.

As Glennon Doyle would say, “Both are hard, pick your hard.” Which hard helps you cultivate a life of joy and vitality and purpose? I know you know the answer.

As I’m sure you can agree because you are here reading this and maybe even considering purchasing a journal, we all know that this work really matters. If we are going to live lives that are filled with joy and vitality and meaning and purpose, we need to do this work. We cannot stand on the shoulders of a motivational speaker or a religious leader or an author who can inspire us with their story or give us big feelings about an idea but then stay stuck in an unending cycle of frustration, commitment to change, lack of consistent action, and so on.

The first step to true, lasting change is discovering your true self. Not your surface-level, socially acceptable, politically correct, and professional-networking-event self. But the gritty, cringe-worthy, profound, maybe a little shocking and scary, probably-should-keep-that-thought-to-yourself self. Only then will you be able to see yourself accurately, to develop compassion and love for all of who you are and why you’ve shown up in the ways you have, to let go of the shame and regrets by giving yourself grace for that version of yourself, to have a sense of gratitude for all of the circumstances that cultivated who you are, and to truly understand why you are a freaking amazing human whose authentic presence and voice and story matters so much to this world. Then you can accurately decide what actually needs changing and make a plan to do so because you’ll trust yourself to do the things that will give you the most beautiful and authentic life you can imagine.

So, I invite you to join me and begin (or continue) this rewarding work. It is a never-ending journey with opportunities to grow every day. My hope is that you grab a hold of this journey with two hands and that you embrace it as close to your heart as possible until it becomes an inseparable part of you. Welcome all you will learn with an open mind and spirit. Get ready to meet yourself.

The thirty prompts in Thirty Days of Self-Discovery (available soon!) are meant to help you better understand who you are, help you see your true self more clearly, and help you take your self-awareness to a level that inspires you to make changes where changes need to be made, to dive deeper on areas of growth that matter, and to give yourself compassion for where you’re at and how far you’ve come. They are designed to pierce through the external social and cultural conditioning so many of us wear as armor and truly land on our most real, true, pure and authentic beliefs, values, and desires.